"Bluebird Series" seems as if it would be a
harmless set of poems, taking in account the
symbolic simplicity and frailty of a bluebird.
However, this set deals with the theme of frailty.
Whereas in the prior collection, where the
agony and pain was all in my head, this set
addresses the rise and fall of self-worth and
self esteem when life deals you a curve ball and
you strike out.
This is perhaps the period of life so far that
I'm most afraid of and never wish to revisit.
If the "2am Series" was the autumn of my life
thus far, then this "Bluebird Series" is definitely
the winter.
Many have asked about the symbolic importance
of the bluebird, and some men have actually written
poems to me during this period trying to convey
to me that they were my bluebird. They all thought
the bluebird was symbolic of my hope. It may have
seemed that way on the surface, but in truth, I was
jealous of Brother Bluebird because his wings were
still intact and he could still fly, whereas mine
were broken and I could not take flight. He'd come
chat with me and make me feel better while I was
mending and healing, but it was always jealousy that
bit me when I watched him fly away and soar out
from my garden of sunflowers.
Once I healed and recovered, I never spoke to
Brother Bluebird again, much like how I never
spoke to those boys ever again.
